The mom awards

We’re in the midst of awards season, with celebrities of all types taking home hardware for songs or movie roles. I don’t pay much attention, honestly, but it got me thinking about all the awards we could – and probably should – be giving to the incredible moms out there.

Parenting is often a thankless job, but sometimes just making it through the day is enough to earn mom a gold statue or at least a couple hours at the spa. But we do what we have to do, collapse into bed, and then do it all over tomorrow. We don’t expect recognition, we don’t wait for cards or flowers, we aren’t surprised when our kids forget to thank us for feeding and clothing them.

But just for fun, let’s think about what an award ceremony would be like if we did honor moms for all those mundane, daily tasks.

Best new life hack – This would go to the mom who has found a perfectly genius way to accomplish something that every single mother finds difficult. Maybe it’s a new method to get kids to eat their vegetables, or put their shoes on without being asked a million times.

Best writing – When you remember to write down all of the milestones and cute things your baby has accomplished for a whole year. Kudos.

Best group performance – Did you and dad have a moment of ultimate synchronization, when you tag-teamed to perfection and actually accomplished something in record time? This one’s for you.

Best stunt – This is to honor that time you had to move at lightning speed and contort your body into an unnatural position to catch your crazy preschooler when he was falling from the latest unsafe spot he had climbed to.

Best music video – That moment when you turn your phone on, find the camera app, and hit record without the little munckin actually noticing. They keep doing that seriously adorable dance that you’ve been talking up for weeks, and you manage to capture it forever. And you think, I’m totally playing this at their wedding someday.

Best hairstyling – Did you get your little girl to sit still long enough to comb her hair into pigtails or a braid? And did she keep it in for longer than 30 seconds? That’s a win for sure.

Album of the Year – Hey, if you managed to actually find the time and energy to print your favorite pictures from the last year in a nice, neat photo book, you have most definitely earned this.

Best director – For that time you gave clear instructions (without yelling), your children actually responded, and you made it to that event on time and looking good. It doesn’t happen often, we know.

The list could go on and on. Like an endurance award for the mom with a clingy toddler who can’t even put her down long enough to take a shower; a creativity award for the mom who made a healthy dinner that everyone actually ate and enjoyed; maybe a lifetime achievement award for those that raised more than a couple happy, well-adjusted young adults that are contributing to society – and didn’t go mad in the process.

Hats off to all you, fellow moms. You’re all winners.

Cheryl Hazelton
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